Choosing Ourselves First

I am kind. I am beautiful. I love myself for who I am.

“Joy Begets Joy” ~ Dr. Manulani Aluli Meyer 

The joy of our family and those around us can drive us to moving mountains for the ones we love. How many times have you said “Iʻd do anything for my children, spouse, you fill it in. Too many times to count. While we will move heaven and earth to ensure our loved ones find joy, we can often forget about the most important person in every room we walk into …ourselves. 

Love is a beautiful thing. Providing us with the fuel to endure lifeʻs hardest moments. It inspires us, drives us to become better, and with it we can feel powerful and able to do all things. But what happens when that same love is missing in ourselves? When we pour so much into others and forget about us? Without that feeling of a joyful love we can find ourselves pulled down into the depths of the sorrow that sometimes exists right beside joy.  So then what? I know Iʻm not alone in sharing the lows that can come from serving others from a very full and grateful heart.

How do we give ourselves the same love and joy we so easily give others? One small choice at a time. Bell Hooks, author of the book, All About Love, reminds us that “love is an action, never simply a feeling.” It takes work to feel and create love. It can feel selfish to consider the things we need to feel loved, appreciated, and joyful, but hereʻs the truth, THAT is the magic that allows us to show up day after day to serve the ones we love, by deeply loving ourselves first. 

So here I am being vulnerable and sharing a daily habit that has truly changed my life. It may sound silly but hear me out. 

I set my alarm to wake before my household. I drink a glass of water, open a notebook, and write five things that I love about myself with no judgments. Then comes the scary part. I read them aloud one by one, and start with the powerful words, I AM. 

Thatʻs it! Then I go about my day. Starting my day by reflecting on all that I love about myself has shifted how I feel and love others. Try it.  You may be surprised by how good it feels to start the day choosing you. 

Declare it. Speak it. Believe it. And so it is ♥️

Resource: Beautiful Chorus ft. India Arie-I Am

How about you?

Reflection Question

Think of 5 things you love about yourself or 5 things you want to call into your life. Add I AM in front of each one.

Examples:
Kind → I AM kind.
I wish I was more Patient → I AM patient.

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